Well last Wednesday night saw us tell my 4 boys. I honestly felt sick in the stomach, I just didn't know how to tell them. Hubby stepped up to the plate and dealt the initial blow. The look of shock on faces wasn't great, but after that initial shock, Mr10 was actually doing a happy dance. I knew he didn't quite understand the implications so I had to gently say that it meant he would have to move schools and not see his friends any more......then the tears started.
So the overall results from this conversation were:
Mr17 - handled it as I thought he would. He just kept saying "its okay mum". He will be staying here until Year 12 finishes so for him it isn't an immediate kind of thing, he will move in with his Dad.
Mr15 - also will stay for as long as he is able. He has dealt with it ok, he admits he doesn't want to go but understands that we need to.
I love the way these two boys are dealing with it, so grown up and not at all the way I would have dealt with it when I was a teenager with a close network of friends.
Mr11 has been pretty quiet. I haven't yet told him that he will be starting high school next year. Here in South Australia, high school starts in Year 8,,,in Victoria it is Year 7. That for him, is next year. He struggles at school and I must admit I am very worried how he will cope. He is on a negotiated education plan, which basically just means that he has difficulties in learning and they try to (supposedly) do things a little differently with him. I think when it comes time, I will have major problems with this one as he tends to bottle up anger and then we have a major explosion, we shall see.
Mr10, after the tears had subsided, is now actually quite eager. He knows he will be starting a new school but he is also excited about all the new things there will be to see and do in Melbourne. I know though, that starting a new school for him isn't going to be pretty. It has taken until now, in Year 4 for him to properly settle into school, so restarting, knowing no one is going to be very hard on him too.
Friday, we went to tell Miss13. We met up with her after school and she was accompanied by her mum. This proved to be rather interesting and has caused me major stress ever since. She was very quiet when we told her and basically just stood there saying nothing. We will talk to her properly about it when she comes here on Friday.
But in the course of the conversation we learnt that her mother is planning on taking the kids to WA. She wants to go and work in the mines with her, now fiance. This has me concerned, very concerned. I have been crunching numbers of thte impact financially of the increased cost of child support for hubby to pay (quarter of his salary!) and also trying to work out the costs involved with flying the kids back and forth in school holidays to and from Adelaide. (Just Hubby's two kids alone is going to be a struggle to do financially (especially since Mr11 with Autism cannot travel alone, he needs a carer with him)), but doing this from Western Australia (possibly Kalgoorlie) to Victoria is just horrific and would cripple us. We wouldn't be able to afford it at all!
Obviously since we are moving ourselves, its not like we can jump up and down about her going there, but I am really concerned that this will totally cut hubby off from his kids. I don't want to split our family up.
So here we are, treading water, not really knowing what the heck is going on. Hubby can't talk to his boss until May 23 so we are in limbo land right now. I know that we will have to go, but we don't know when exactly. So right now I am starting to go through our stuff and just culling as much as I can. I could be painting the house but right now I feel that culling is a better place to start.
We have been concentrating our research on Pakenham and Cranbourne areas for schooling and real estate. I like Pakenham because it is just that little bit away from the rat race but I am wondering if it is too far out when it comes to jobs for the kids, I don't want to disadvantage them at all. If money was no object we'd be fine lol, but since the difference in the Adelaide to Melbourne house markets are so steep we have to be realistic.
Ok, off to sort through stuff,,,,,,,,