Monday, September 17, 2012

Just give me a break!!!!!!!!!!!

I haven't really mentioned much about Hubby's new job before.  It is with the same company but he is now the General Manager on a 6 month trial basis at least.  At the end of the 6 months if the big boss likes the job he has done he and hubby is happy with the job, the position will be his permanently (along with the pay rise that made hubby want the job in the first place), if not he will stay on his current pay but move to a sales rep job within the company instead.

I worried about him taking this job as I could see alot of travel.  Hubby said no there won't be, so I gave in and agreed that it will be "better" in the long run for us.  Well we have been here 8 weeks and in that time he has had 4 trips already,,,,,not bad for not much travel huh.  He had been in the job 1 week when he came home saying he had to leave the following afternoon for Sydney for the night and would be back on the Friday night.  This one got cancelled because the morning he was meant to leave was the day that my Mum passed away.

We got in a couple of weeks when we got back from the funeral with no travel.  Until  two weeks ago he came home Monday night to announce he would be leaving at 4am the following morning to go to Brisbane for 2 days and wouldn't be back until Wednesday night at about 9pm.

Last week he came home Monday night announcing another trip, this time to Perth.  He would be leaving at 4am the following morning and this time wouldn't arrive home until after midnight Wednesday night/Thursday morning. 

But the icing on the cake was when he came home on Friday night announcing he was going to Germany next Thursday.  He leaves Thursday afternoon on the 20th and won't be back until Friday night on the 28th!!! 

I kinda lost it.  This job was the job of an older guy who is actually past retirement age and has finally sidestepped to do consulting for them instead.  I really feel that this type of job is better suited to an older guy or a single guy rather than a family man. I thought I could deal with hit provided it didn't interfere with our time with the kids we have left behind.  Well look what has happened, the very first school holidays since our move!

The school term finishes this week.  We were meant to be heading back to Adelaide to pick up the other kids on Saturday morning and we were going to have them for the two weeks.  I was so upset.  It has taken us all weekend to re-organise the school holidays and I'm not at all pleased with the outcome but I just have to like it or lump it as its the best we could do.

Now we have organised with the help of my Ex (thank you!!) that my Ex will drive over next Sunday with my two older boys and then head back to Adelaide on Monday.  (I am having car troubles and I don't trust my car to make it all that way and I really don't want to break down in the middle of nowhere,,,,especially since I am also having mobile phone issues and am finding that to be less than reliable at the moment as well!).  My boys will stay here for the two weeks of the holidays,,,,,,they were a little disappointed that we will be a little limited for the first week due to my car but they really want to see the house and spend time with me anyway so just bumming around watching DVDs, walking the dogs and chatting will be okay for the first 5 days.

Then after hubby returns home on the Friday night, we will need to be up bright and early on the Saturday morning to head to Adelaide to pick up his two kids.  (I couldn't organise a way to get them here due to Mr12's Autism, it just wasn't possible and also due to the way he is with me, I really probably wouldn't have been able to manage him for 5 or so days by myself anyway, he would have totally freaked if hubby wasn't here!).  Sadly that means that Miss13 misses out too but she didn't want to travel on her own and it would have been yet another expense for us too.  So we will head back on Saturday, stay the night and then return back here on Sunday.  My older two boys will be staying here on their own on the weekend,,,,,,that will be interesting, just hoping they will be okay in the unfamiliar surroundings (I'm just a worry wort lol).

Hubby will work on Monday and Tuesday and then take Wednesday to Friday off so that we can take all the kids to the Melbourne Aquarium, the Zoo and the markets on the Friday before heading back to Adelaide on the Saturday and yet another return trip on the Sunday.

The shine has gone off the holidays for me.  I am really looking forward to having the kids but feel so disappointed that it has gone pear shaped.

The most upsetting part for me though is the travel for Hubby.  I am a born worrier and I just don't sleep much at all when he is away.  I am really worried about him going to the other side of the world, even though I know he will be fine, it just makes me so nervous.  I worry about things going wrong here and the fact that I still know no one here and have no one to turn to if something does go wrong.  I worry about something going wrong for/with him and him being on his own too.

The amount of travel he has been doing is really getting to me too.  I know people have jobs where they are travelling alot and I know plenty of wives don't mind it and some even like it, but that is just not me.  I love family time and I love the family unit being together.  It really stresses me when that unit is broken.  I know I sound absolutely neurotic but that is just me these days.  I think the whole moving house, leaving behind my family and friends, finding my way around a new State, my Mum's death and trying to deal with everything that has to be done with that and trying to settle these two kids in to their new school and desperately missing the other kids and stressing that my boys won't want to make the move here is all just piling up and all this travel has just pushed me to the edge.

So I am going back to the mantra....."I think I can, I think I can"


Joolzmac said...

I think you have had to cop so much since you moved 8 weeks ago and now this is another blow.
Jeepers, has your hubby travelled OS before? Is he going with someone else?
I really feel for you - I know I'd be upside down too!

I do hope the holidays with the kids is good for you, fingers crossed!

Cheers- Joolz

Tania @ Out Back said...

I would not like this at all either Colleen. My hubby goes away but only for one, two or three days at a time. I actually enjoy my time when he is away. I dont go anywhere just enjoy the quiet lol!

You may as well have stayed in Adelaide :)

Feel for you with your on going dilemmas...


Anonymous said...

Oh Colleen it seems life is not getting any easier....I would be really pissed off. My ex is a truck driver who use to be away all week and then home on the weekends and the whole hoousehold routine went south..and I felt like a single parent when I wasnt!! Hang in the lovely hopefully he will not keep travelling and turning life upside down much longer. Enjoy your time with the kids in the hols xx

Niki said...

Hi love, I hope he is home by now & everything starts to get into a new groove. I hate it when my hubs is away. Really don't like the nights much at all. I am a bit of a fraidy cat at night and I feel for the kids when he is gone because I am exhausted & crappy at them. Anyway I hope you get a break soon.